Running In The Winter With Nut Jobs

This post is for the reluctant runners who keep getting yanked from their warm, cozy nest by some crazed nut job insisting on running outside in the winter.  (See picture above for example of nut jobs.)

Below are a few winter running tips to help you survive in the nut job environment:

Tight is Right - wear tight fitting clothes to keep the heat in.  Top it off with a good wind jacket and the toughest mental attitude you can pretend to have.

Vaseline - Put it on your lips and nose and any other exposed part of your face.  Also spread some on your knuckles and finger tips before putting your gloves on.   It's a great insulator and protection from the wind on those mean and nasty days.  And who doesn't look good with Vaseline rubbed all over them?

Duct Tape - I've read that duct taping your shoes for extreme cold runs is a good thing.  Haven't tried it yet, but I'm throwing a roll into my running bag.  Duct tape has many uses.  You really shouldn't go anywhere without it.  For some examples, see Innovative Uses For Duct Tape.

Toe Warmers - They're not just for your toes.  Buy the kind that have adhesive on them so you can stick them right onto your water bottle.  "Frozen water" syndrome will be a thing of the past.

Also, if your nut job running friend is training for an ultra and eying you up for companionship on the long runs (20 - 40 miles in the snow and wind) it wouldn't hurt to sign up for a survival course at the local YMCA.

Check out the upcoming Beast Of Burden Winter 100 and you'll understand what I mean.

Bringing The Run Inside

"There's no such thing as bad weather, just soft people."

- Bill Bowerman

Winter running is great for thickening the blood, building endurance and just plain toughening up, but sometimes you need a break.

There's no shame in doing an inside workout now and then, no matter what Bill Bowerman says.  After all, isn't that why you bought all of that equipment?

Constant running in the snow and ice can be tough on your body.  Give your knees and hips a break.

The elliptical is easy on the joints and will give you a great workout. 

For cardio workouts and endurance training, try the sparkpeople site.

Of course, eventually you do need to go back outside, especially if you're training for something completely insane like the Beast of Burden.

But who would be crazy enough to do something like that?

Canal Fever

"Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."
— Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

The signs were there. It was so obvious once you knew what to look for.

It explained why Cliff insisted on marking the trail beforehand with 40 lb cannonballs. And why Rajiv felt it was okay to run a 100 miler in a  tutu.

They had Canal Fever- the disturbing mental state from running too many winter miles along the Erie Canal.

Some say the ghosts come right out of the water to greet you as you pass mile 50.

Baba watched the meltdown of his life long running buddies and smiled.

Perhaps this race was winnable after all.

“Baba, I need your opinion,” Cliff said, wild eyed, at mile 53. “I’ve been seeing ghosts for the last couple of miles. They want me to swim in the canal with them. Do you think I should?”

“Sure,” said Baba “If you can’t trust a ghost, who can you trust?“

He watched Cliff do an Olympic somersault dive into the icy canal and float away.

As Rajiv and Baba continued down the trail, Rajiv looked worried. “Hey Baba," he whispered. "Can I ask you something?”

“Sure Raj.  What's up?”

Rajiv ducked from a forty foot imaginary bird flying overhead. “It’s that damn pterodactyl,” he said. “I can’t seem to shake him."

Baba nodded knowingly. He pointed to a few cannonballs Cliff had planted at mile 54.  “Why don’t you run with one of those. You can throw it at the bird if it gets too aggressive."

Rajiv looked at Baba as if he were a genius.

“Thanks,” said Rajiv, adjusting his tutu as he picked up one of the cannonballs. The weight of it gave him a feeling of safety. “Maybe I should take two. Just in case.”

“Good thinking,” said Baba as he ran ahead, leaving Rajiv to struggle with his balls.

There was a gurgling sound from the water. “Hey Cliff,” Baba shouted as he ran by. “This isn’t a triathlon, you know. but have a good swim anyway.”

"Gurgle, gurgle, aaaaahhhh," said Cliff with a great deal of emotion.

“Only 42 more miles to go,” Baba thought, laughing aloud. “And I still feel pretty damn good.”

Up ahead a giant drooling mule waited for him, gnashing her sharp, jagged teeth.

The clouds seemed to be forming words -

“Beware the Canal Fever.”


Have you registered for the Beast of Burden yet?

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Baby It's Cold Outside

It's 16 degrees outside (minus 2000 with the wind chill factored in). I get home from work, cold and tired, ready to sink into Warm & Toasty Land.

Then the phone rings.

It's nutjob #1.

"Let's go for a run," he says.

"Baby it's cold out there."

"It's cold weather fun."

"Baby there's ice out there."

"The yak trax are here."

"I really can't go."

"You're going."

"But it's so warm inside."

"Let's go."

"Baby, it's cold outside."

And out the door we go.


Nobody ever said hanging with Nutjobs would be easy.

Reminder to the extreme nutjobs (and you know who you are) there's still time to register for the Winter 100.


Yikes!

Why an Ultra?

Upstate New York, Dead of Winter, 100 miles.


What are they - CRAZY???!!!!

Apparently, 26.2 miles isn't enough of a challenge to some people (nutjob runners). 50 or 100 miles in the dead of winter is more their style. Yes, people have already signed up for the Beast of Burden Winter 100.

There is always the element of uncertainty when you begin any kind of a race. But there are at least 2 things you can count on with this one. It WILL be cold out and you WILL be running with crazy people.

So if you're "hard enough, rough enough, rich enough, and not too blind to see" (Rolling Stones, Beast of Burden") then hop onto the Lockport Towpath, February 27, 2010 and see if you're Beast Worthy. But be sure to pre-register.

Winter Running

It's Winter again. How does this happen? One day you're running in your shorts and singlet, sweat pouring out of your body. The next thing you know, you're pulling your insulated wind pants on and tossing the yak traks in your running bag.

It's cold out. Inside my house it's 70 degrees. Outside, it's 11 degrees. Why go out?

Why? Because I run with nut jobs. Running in the cold is what they do. Below zero? 40 mph winds? Blinding snowstorm? They're practically salivating.

Lesson number one, if you want to stay warm, DON'T RUN WITH NUT JOBS!

Okay, I also go out because I need to run. I don't always feel like running when I leave my house, but I am ALWAYS glad that I ran when I come back in.

If you want to get the miles in and the tension out, running with nut jobs is the way to go. "What is a nut job?" you ask.

A nut job is a runner that is always ready to run, any distance, any pace, any time. If you need help getting motivated to run in the Winter, call a nut job. They'll be happy to run with you through the rain, wind or occasional blizzard.

It's what they do.

Check out my website at lifeworthpainting.com